And so will we

The kitchen faucet is singing today.

It’s a sort of Pluck. Pluck. Pluck. All day long, over and over. I tried stopping it, pushing down on the handle and forcing it to not waste all that water, even if the drips are three seconds apart.

But it keeps singing. I can’t seem to change it, no matter what I do.

So for now, I’m taking comfort in its company.

My eyes aren’t focusing. Dry contacts seem to plague me every day now. I wonder if people notice me blinking, trying to get those plastic discs to feel OK in my eyes, trying to get them to give me a clear picture of this world, like they’re supposed to.

I ran 3.5 miles this morning, I lifted some weights, I did some abs. I weighed myself. Satisfied.

Then I came home and gave in to the box on top of my microwave. Yes, day-old Jones Bros. vanilla cupcakes with frosting two inches high are just as good.

So much for any benefit of that workout.

Pluck. Pluck. Pluck.

I’ve been at my computer for what feels like hours. I’m contemplating going to a thrift store to look for wine glasses and a sewing machine. I’m telling myself that would be a waste of time.

I just applied for another job. It’d be not perfect but good. It’s in a beautiful part of the country and a step up career-wise. I talked to a media recruiter and to a friend who works in the same company. Both said they’d shoot the boss an e-mail.

My days are bleeding together. Yesterday, I spent a lot of time raking leaves. But I left them in two huge piles at the end of my yard. So I’m not done.

Today, my mind is all over the place. What to do next career-wise, who else I could e-mail to see if they know anything, other freelance opportunities … how my babies are doing at school, what housework I should be getting done, how to still feel useful … how much I love the rock-star boyfriend… what to do when the money runs out. How I wish for a nap.

My dad asked what he could do for me.

I don’t know is my answer.

But that faucet continues to run. Pluck. Pluck. Pluck.

And so will we.

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8 thoughts on “And so will we

  1. Hi, Veronica. I don’t know that I’ve ever met you, but I sure heard a lot about you when I worked for the DN in the years after you graduated. I just wanted to say that I enjoyed the work you did on momaha, and I’m sorry this has all happened to you. i appreciated the honesty and tone of your blogs, and I think you’re a great writer. I’m looking forward to seeing what life has in store for you.

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  2. “In a beautiful part of the country” meaning a beautiful part of what city you already live in, because you’re not moving far away right? πŸ™‚

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  3. Most of us just pluck along everyday. A litte of this, a little of that. It’s hard to enjoy the time you have off while unemployed, but you really should try. You never know when it will come to an end, and it may be a long time until you have free time again. Make time to take a short Gallup Strengths test to help you put a bow around your many skills.

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  4. Wishing you lots of luck with a call back. This is one of those times in your life where everyday is a new challenge. You are filled with so much positivity. That counts for so much. πŸ™‚ Jones bros cupcakes…..be still my heart. My sis makes the best cupcakes ever but Jones bros would be a close second.

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  5. There’s something about this post that I really love. I feel like I’m sitting right there with you. I wouldn’t try to stop you from those cupcakes! I wish I was sitting there with you. I wish I could make this all go away. xoxo

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